"If you know my longing heart, please come back to me..." ~From the Korean song "Will Be Back" by Lim Sun Hye
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He should've noticed that one attack. He should've seen it earlier so he could shield her from it. But all he could think of right now was those things he should've done to save her.
It was too late.
He couldn't do it.
He didn't do it.
He couldn't give that heck of a reason that he was preoccupied when several Indavers were blocking him. He could've destroyed all of them.
But he couldn't.
He never did.
And now here she was--lying there unconscious.
Hammie took the hit that was supposed to be for him. Just as how Champ did the same thing before.
Stinger closed his eyes tightly and clenched his fists the same way. He wanted to shout and throw his rage to almost everything and everyone but he still tried not to do that. It would only frustrate him even more.
He was sitting on the lounge chair outside the infirmary where Hammie was currently at and being tended. It was definitely a repeat of what happened back then with Champ. What in the world was going on? Why did it have to happen again?
Despite his friends' consolation, it seemed that none of them actually registered in his mind at all. He remained sitting there until the doctor and Commander Shou Ronpou said to him that Hammie was out of danger. But the impact of the attack which she sustained would let her stay unconscious for a few days.
"Partner..." Champ called out. Stinger just raised his head to look at the bull. His eyes were lifeless, which worried even Kotaro. "It's not your fault. That monster would've hit anyone on the team."
Those words didn't console him, though. He lowered his head once again, his fist clenched tighter than it was a while back.
He could've saved her. He could've spared her from the pain and... this. He was supposed to be in her place.
But he wasn't. And it was hurting him--too much.
"I'm sorry... Hammie..." he whispered, his tone in pain and regret.
For a week that passed, Stinger stayed like that, continually blaming himself for what happened. No matter how many times his comrades would say that it wasn't, it seemed that those words never registered in his mind.
One night, he decided to do some thinking someplace else aside from his room and the Orion's main deck. His heart was beating fast when he finally reached his destination--Hammie's room.
His hand froze in mid-air as he was about to open the door. Was he supposed to hesitate now? He already reached this place. And he finally decided this a while back. Besides, he had to make sure that she was okay... that she would come back.
With that thought, Stinger opened the door to Hammie's room. The lamp placed on the wall was giving off a dim lighting, but it was still enough to let him see her on her bed, still unconscious. His eyes softened at that sight.
As careful as he could, he approached her and sat on the edge of the bed. Before he could even think of what else to do, he found himself holding her hand that was placed on her side. He couldn't help feeling scared when he found it cold. But he calmed down when he felt her pulse.
"Why am I going through this because of you?" To be honest, it was the question that Stinger had been struggling to find answers for a week since Hammie was taken down by that monster.
Though his friends, particularly Champ, already defeated it, he still couldn't find satisfaction in it. He could tell that his partner did it for him. But it wasn't enough.
He looked at the sleeping Hammie once again with his hand holding hers as gently as he could. He'd been wanting to see her awake, smiling at everyone... smiling at him. He wanted to see that again.
He had been longing for that again. Her smile that would always complete his day even though she didn't know that. Her cheerfulness that would make everyone smile.
He wanted to see it all again.
Most of all, he just wanted to see her smiling at him, telling him that it was okay. That everything would be okay.
But because of him, here she was.
"Stinger?"
He was snapped from his own musings and raised his head when he heard that. His eyes widened when he saw those sleepy eyes looking at him. He appeared to have been frozen to the spot because of that.
"What are you doing here?" Hammie continued asking before she could even notice his hand holding hers.
But when she did, she couldn't stop the warmth creeping up to her cheeks. Why--? How--?
It didn't take long before Stinger finally noticed the one thing that made Hammie quiet again. He looked down at their holding hands. But instead of letting it go, he did something else entirely that surprised her.
As careful as he could, he lowered down and embraced Hammie. Her eyes widened at that sudden action that she didn't know what to say or do. But her expression soon changed to worry when she noticed something as Stinger remained embracing her.
Though it wasn't very obvious, she could tell that Stinger was crying. His shoulders were shaking, no matter how subtle it was.
"Stinger? What's wrong?" Hammie asked in worry. Did she do something that made him like this?
"I'm sorry... I'm so sorry..." was all Stinger said in between silent cries.
Hammie was speechless. Why was he apologizing?
And then she recalled the battle that put her unconscious for several days. How she realized that the monster would hit Stinger and before she could even stop herself, she ran towards Stinger and blocked the attack that was supposed to hit him.
Could that be the reason why he was saying sorry to him?
But she chose not to say anything. For some reason, she could tell that Stinger won't listen even if she said that it wasn't his fault. Instead, she raised her free hand--the one that he wasn't holding--and placed it on Stinger's back. She tapped it as lightly as she could and rubbed it, as well. Hoping that she would be able to convey her message through that.
For now, it was for the best if no words would be said to convey each other's message.
For now, Stinger was glad that Hammie was finally awake.
For now, Hammie was glad that Stinger wasn't hurt.
At least for now, they would relish this moment before it would all be over.
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I had to play the song "Will Be Back" in repeat for me just to get writing through this. Man, where did my inspiration go when I needed it the most? Haha! Yeah, I know. Way too much drama. Not just on this note but in this one-shot, as well.
Well, here's the first one-shot (at last!)
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